Whats the best phrase or saying you have heard ... (1 Viewer)

simmo

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heres a couple to start this off


iv"e seen milk turn quicker than your spanner

your monoflexing is that bad it looks like a haunted house,

if brains were gun powder there would"nt be enough to blow your saftey helmet off
 
Don't kid the kid who kiddid, billie the kid

are you setting that standard, or making love to it

Question-Eveything, Believe-Nothing,Trust -Nobody
 
You can stop wrapping that double, your nose is starting to bleed.

( On keeping 5 squads of brickies working) you lying ****, you couldnt keep a mouse going in Cheese.:D

You couldnt put a Scaffold round a manhole without fecking it up.:D

Ive worked on jobs where the Pigeons wouldnt land.:D

Triple handrails, toeboards, Brick guards you couldnt throw yourself off never mind fall off.:D
 
phrase's

I've seen more life in a tramps vest.
 
On seeing a dodgy scaffold " You Fecking kidding mate, i wouldnt even let a Mackem work on that".;)

Heard this one, While a Scaff was doing a 'Stack' he lost his footing and rolled off the roof, fortunately landing on his feet in a flowerbed. " who the feck do you think you are John Wayne, get back up there, and get those pansys oot yer arse:eek:
 
scaff struggling with a return .. bruno you ever going to get out of that corner
wrapping a check fitting up... theres juice coming out of tube

the lift is running down ... my saftey helmet has rolled off it
 
Couldn't scaffold a doll's house, couldn't put a nut in a monkey's mouth, my balls are hairy not crystal how am i supposed to know, less yap yap more wrap wrap.
 
you'v been on that Job so long M8, your growin a feckin beard LOLoooo WWWoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooosh :nuts:
 
the most famous one

its a spanner not a magic fu..kin wand
 
Hi lads

Some good one liners i've heard over the years: -

What have you levelled that with a bottle of Lucozade?

This ones still growing (on being given a heavy board)

Save your breath, you'll need it later to blow up your girlfriend

I'm sure more will spring to mind!!
 
washing line

"Take the washing of the line" when you get a tube passed to you when striking with fittings still on "IT"
 
[carrying a heavy board] flippin ekk whats this made out of, OAK.
[Droppin the spanner] IT GOT A BIT HOT.
[A bent tube] THATS FOR GOIN ROUND CORNERS.

MANY MORE BUT VERY EXPLICIT.
 
My Dad's favorite is 'Its up here for thinking and down there for dancing' This is usually said when he puts up a complicated section of scaff that he thinks no other can do.
 
if u see ur mate struggling a bit i allways say do u want me 2 get my lad in and give u a lift soft ****
 
You been on that scaffold so long they is giving you a rent book.
And one of the boys who was late back from his dinner (and this is offshore) and pulled by the foreman and was asked as to why he was late back------- My mammy wisnae in the day so I had to go to my grannies for dinner....
 
When i was labouring,one scaff i worked with would say ill do the thinking, you do the stinking..
 
he`s got a smile like a witchdoctors necklace (after a couple of accidents with his spanner)
 
trying to knock a nail in with a spanner, you could"nt hit a cows arse with a shovel
 
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